You know I love you, right? Good.
Please be advised that approximately 33.3% of my tirade this morning is due to the fact that I just spent an hour of my day yesterday (not to mention about 33.3% of my checking account) to outfit you all with appropriate, new winter gear.
A second 33.3% can be attributed to the fact that I spent another considerable amount of time just this past Saturday morning finding enough snowpants and hats and mittens around the house to hold you over until the new stuff arrives in the mail. Yes, Little C, you are wearing raspberry colored mittens. But you are like the coolest kid and class and can totally pull it off. And, yes, Big C, you are wearing a safety-orange hat. I haven't a clue where it came from. But I washed it. And your head will be warm and dry and those were my priorities.
The last third of my temper is a hold-over from the past, I'm guessing 11, years of my life! Keeping track of you all and all of your things is generally a smooth process. But when you casually meander around in the morning wasting time I kinda lose it. When I say, "Guys, it is snowing, go up and put on warm clothes and brush your teeth," I am actually expecting you to put on the warm clothes and brush your teeth. In no way does a pair of shorts and a t-shirt qualify just because you thought enough to pull on wool socks. (That is kind of like praying instead of using a condom, but I'll save that lecture until you are a little older.) Plus, yesterday when you were done playing outside would have been the right time to bring your mittens in the house. Instead, I sent you to school with cold, wet, raspberry mittens that I had to dig around in the snow by the tree house to find.
Big C, underneath your pile of 3 hoodies, 1 lunchbox, 1 raincoat, 1 backpack, 1 pair snowpants, 4 books, 3 pulleys, and 1 winter coat, is a set of empty drawers. Just to review: bag goes in the bottom. Hats and mits and library books go in the top. Lunchbox in the kitchen. Coats on hooks. Clothes in laundry or room. Wet things on the rack by the furnace. These are requirements, not suggestions.
It is neither my job nor my pleasure to remind you of these things repeatedly every step of the way. What you are teaching me, by ignoring these directives, is that my little notes and drawings and reminders and clear instructions do not work. You are teaching me that yelling at you is the only way you will listen to me prior to 9 am. And since I am not interested in yelling at you at all (let alone prior to 9 am) I am going to teach you something new. I recommend paying attention because you will be held responsible for the following:
Since it IS my job to teach you to be prepared and organized and responsible, this is the strategy I have come up with. I will be taking $25 from each of you. I will use this money to replace any winter gear you lose this season. I will also compensate myself for time and energy wasted helping you look for your things in the morning. (Helpful TIP: before bed every night when I remind you to get your stuff ready for school the next day I recommend doing just that.) There is a system already in place that will allow you meet these goals and recover your full $25 dollars come Spring if you choose to utilize it. If not, you will lose the cash. It is called a security deposit and, trust me, learning that lesson now will save you time and money in the future. And your mother's sanity in the present.
Love, the Mama
No comments:
Post a Comment