take light-years off your figure

I am kind of fascinated by mannequins. I love how they started out trying to look human and now they look like aliens. Even more, I find it psychologically intriguing that they started out trying to look human and now many humans try to look like them.

Which, if I have my logic correct, means we are trying to look like aliens. No thanks. Not for me. I am too short and too curvy to try for that shit. Maybe I could try and look like the alien mothership. That's a goal well within in my reach...and not far from it, either. I am going to put that on my calendar for June.

To serve my circum-40 peer group, I have come up with an idea to help those who maybe are interested in cultivating that mannequin look. It can start with something as simple as nipples. I don't know when they grew them, but they have them. The closest I can pin it on the fashion timeline is within the last 10 years. I suspect it has something to do with the late shift at the torso-molding facility and a couple of co-workers who give the job about 40% of their time and the other 60% to their porn/pot habits.

Specifically we are considering size and placement. Although I live in a cold climate, I am far too interested in staying warm to sacrifice comfort for naturally reproducing the mannequinesqe breast. The solution is easy and cheap. It could even be FREE if you know someone with a toddler.

Cheerios.

Yep. Cheerios. Honey Nut Cheerios seem to work the best for two reasons. First, once you start to perspire a little they stick in place. Secondly, that coating makes them a bit more durable. You can just slip one in each cup wherever you'd like them. Higher. Lower. I guess it depends on which department you shop in. If Young Miss is your ideal, I'd say start higher.