Alpha: What? Who said that? (looks around sees no one)
Lucky: know who that shirt would look good on? a 12 year old boy. might want to swing over to intimate apparel too, dear. or maybe just shorten those straps. it'll help.
Alpha: It's you! (takes the sweater down from its hanger)
Lucky: (sigh) that feels better. now shrug up those straps before you try me on.
Alpha: (does what she was told and pulls the sweater over her head) Say now! You are one cute sweater. And look at that! Somewhere between you and my new haircut...my neck looks long!
Lucky: yah. i get that a lot. people love me.
Alpha: You are a deep-v, banded bottom, kimono sleeved hoody, what's not to love? And you feel very soft right off the rack.
Lucky: yah. like you've had me for ages, right? i'm kinda known for that. it's the long cotton fibers. i wash well too.
Alpha: Those are great qualities in a sweater. So why the apathy?
Lucky: hmm. people love me...they just don't $100 love me. i'd say they more like $60 love me. so here i hang. waiting for a markdown.
Alpha: Someone will $100 love you! They will! You just have to be patient. But she'll come for you. I just know it. Maybe if you were a little...I don't know....maybe if you just sighed a little less.
Lucky: what? and act all i.n.c.? like "i know you are a mother of two but if you wear me you can keep those memories of being a slightly-slutty club-hopping 20 year old fresh for a bit longer."
Alpha: I KNOW! Right!? No, I didn't mean like that. 'Cause that's just gross. I was trying to suggest that you have a lot going for you so smile about it! You are a classic color with some amazing details. You are a go-to closet staple, my friend. Not some trendy thing that will get left at the cleaners because someone forgot to come and get you. You can go with dark trouser jeans and heels and look appropriate for a nice dinner out. Or a pair of bermuda khakis and sandals and be right at home at a summer bridal shower. You can even go over a tank with a long skirt and flip-flops and pull off the midwest surfer thing that is so popular.
Lucky: surfer?
Alpha: I know we're functionally land-locked. What can I say?
Lucky: (sigh)
Alpha: There you go with the mournful exhale again.
Lucky: it's just...
Alpha: What? You are talking to me in a box of mirrors...we have no secrets here, Lucky. What is it?
Lucky: it's just that...well...it's not you. you don't $100 love me either. i can tell.
Alpha: It's true.
Lucky: you don't have to smile about it.
Alpha: But I know something you do not know! (pulls something from her purse)
Lucky: (dares to smile) you don't!
Alpha: I DO! And...it's for 20% off. Lucky, darling, today is your day! I $80 love you!
Lucky: you do!? I thought you might be the one when I saw your Artist Circle bag. something about an embroidered bird saying, "Peace!" made me think it might be you! i feel so...lucky!
Alpha: Me too!
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